BeattheBlerch

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Thereareplentyoffitnessappsouttheremotivatingyoutorun.Welcometothefirstappthatdemotivatesyou:BeattheBlerch.TheBlerch:Animaginarycreaturerepresentingyourdarkest,mostsloth-likedesirestotakeiteasy,skipyourrun,andeatallthecakeyoucangetyourhandson.You:Therunner.YoumustsomehowsummonthemotivationtokeeprunningtostayonestepaheadoftheBlerch.AvoidalltheGiantDonuts,BigSlurpFountainsandBeerKrakens(yes,BeerKrakens)hethrowsinyourwaytostopyou.HowtoPlay:Pickyourrunnerandhitstart.Tapthescreentojumpoverobstacles.Runandtrytogetasfarasyoucan!Basedonthebest-sellingbook,TheTerribleandWonderfulReasonsWhyIRunLongDistances,byOatmealcreatorMatthewInman.BeattheBlerchisaninfiniterunninggamelikenoother.Becauseithascake.Andperiodicallyinsultsyou,andthehorseyourodeinon.Andthewonderfuldemotivationcontinuesoutsidethegame.Withoriginal,periodicallyhysterical,messagesfromtheBlerchtoyou.Demotivatingyoufromworkingoutandencouragingyoutositdown,bingewatchTVandeatsomecake.Eatthewholegoddamthing.Doyouhavethefortitudetowithstandthetemptation,andsticktoyourrun?OrwillyoubeluredintoaMayonnaiseHellPit(yes,it’sathing).